Comedian Steve Harvey, the best-selling author of Act Like a Lady, Think Like Man and a self-professed expert on manhood, is here to take you inside the male mind. Whether you're looking for Mr. Right or trying to forget Mr. Wrong, Steve isn't holding anything back.
During his first visit to The Oprah Show , the audience was a mix of men and women…but not today. Now, the seats are filled with ladies! What burning questions do these women have for the King of Comedy? Many women have long lists that describe what they're looking for in a man…but are their standards simply too high? Yinka and Lynell are two something friends who have long lists. They're here to ask Steve if they'll ever find a man who meets all their requirements.
Lynell says she's looking for a God-fearing, spontaneous African-American millionaire with straight teeth and nice shoes who wants children…among other things. Steve says single ladies do need to set standards. You've got to have them. You've got to know what you're looking for," he says. God has already made him," he says. He's wearing the clothes you like. You're not waiting on him to be born. All you've got to do is stay patient. There are millions of smart, beautiful women around the world who can't figure out why they're unlucky in love, including a group of friends from New York City.
Steve is here to set them straight. Steve says many successful women dated good men but didn't know it at the time. Even if you look like a million bucks—and you have a few million in the bank—Steve says a woman needs to know how a man shows his love.
It's all about the "three P's. If you've got everything, you can do everything, you've got your own car … you've got a guard dog and a handgun. The guy is thinking, 'Where do I fit in here? Instead, he says strong women have to walk a thin line.
Why don't a man just come to me? If you're projecting it, where does a man fit in there? Even if they aren't interested, don't they want closure? Steve has a simple answer to this question…no.
And you know why? Because we don't even know you're having an issue. Listen, it's not in our DNA as great communicators anyway," he says. If you want closure, close. Move on with your life.
Sex, or "the cookie" as Steve calls it in his book, is a major point of contention for many couples. If you don't think it's important to your man, Steve says you're wrong. A man has to have love, support and the cookie. Michele found out her boyfriend of many years was cheating after he told her he was ready to settle down and get married.
The male mind may be a mystery to women, but Steve says there's a simple explanation for this behavior. Please know that about a man. If he's going to cheat, it has nothing to do with his emotional attachment to you or his feelings for you.
You haven't done anything," he says. Let the baggage go. Sadly, many women have dated men who cheat…and most of them don't even know it. Steve says there are a few major reasons why men stray, though none of them excuse the behavior.
They think they can get away with it. The man hasn't become who he wants and needs to be or found who he truly wants to be with. What's happening at home isn't "happening" like it used to.
There's always a woman out there willing to cheat with him. If you're married to a mama's boy, is there anything a wife can do to become the number one woman in his life? Before Jill married her husband of 13 years, she says she knew he was a mama's boy. Over the years, she's grown tired of coming in second. Steve says the first mistake women like Jill make is thinking they can change their men.
Wives must enter into their marriages with their own set of rules to stand a chance. You have to be here to show your son how a man treats a woman. You have to be here to show your daughter how a man should treat her,'" he says. We're unprotected,'" he says. When you call on it and require it, we rise to the occasion. What do men really like?
Just like some men like tall women with freckles and others like their ladies short and blonde, Steve says it varies. But the truth is, he says it doesn't matter much. How do you not feel obligated to sleep with a man after he has spent money on you? From a male perspective, Steve says this question is easy to answer.
If you're a nail tech, you're a nail tech. If you're a hooker, you're a hooker. You determine what you're worth," he says. You don't have romance with a man because of what he buys you. Before you start sliding down a pole, Steve cautions a woman to get to know a guy first. Do it in little increments to kind of get a feel. Plus, the toy that you introduce, please don't let it be bigger than him.
You're going to lose the guy. Steve devotes an entire chapter to this topic in his book. For the next 45 days, that's all you're going to get. If a man says he's going to be there at 7: This old adage isn't always true, according to Steve. You are all going to meet him," he says.