Join our Online Bible Studies for Couples! There are three things your husband feels about sex that you might not know or believe. Although my main audience is wives, many men provide feedback. Again and again, husbands have touched on three themes…which surprised me. So here are three things your husband likely feels about sex, that you might not know or believe. Sex is irrevocably entangled with his feelings of love. For a husband, making love is a primary way to feel, foster, and express love with his wife.
Look at some ways the Bible describes sexual intimacy for a husband: How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume more than any spice! His covenant love is not restricted to the marriage bed, but it is irretrievably wrapped up in that intimate act. One of his greatest desires is to satisfy you sexually. Some claim men are only focused on their sexual desires—getting physical release and living out fantasies.
Yet, husbands repeatedly express how desperately they want their wives to enjoy sex. One particularly interesting command from the Old Testament is: For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married. He thinks your body is beautiful. We often perceive our bodies as less than—less than the magazine cover model, less than we want or used to be, less than we think he should desire.
They wish their wives would believe their reassuring words…and let them delight in that beauty. In the Song of Songs 1: Yet many wives resist sharing their bodies freely with their husbands.
Consider this instruction to a bride from Psalm 45, a royal wedding song: Of course, there are exceptions to each of these.
Some wives have husbands who are critical of their appearance or uninterested in sex altogether. But God can work in your marriage and sexual intimacy.
Still, these three are common themes from husbands. So ask whether your husband feels this way, whether you believe it, and what you can to do to pursue godly sexual intimacy in your marriage. Parker is the author of Sex Savvy: