Intrigued by which of my projects appear when you enter my name in Google, I flicked through the various web pages, and came across something I had never seen before. A rather surprising and scathing attack from someone on the other side of the world. Someone well-reknowned in the world of dating.
Evan Marc Katz is an American dating coach. These days he gives advice specifically to women. Interestingly, his name came up in a brainstorm I was doing earlier this week for my new job role. As with everything I write about dating, it was simply an opinion, and I tried to be as non-patronising as possible.
I know how my writing is generally received, particularly by other people who work in the dating industry. Interestingly, the Huffington Post article in question was one which a number of British experts had praised or shared themselves. All three comments written directly on it were positive ones, agreeing with what I said. So why was Evan Marc so opposed to it?! I personally thought it was helpful and pretty inoffensive! Especially when your own article appears to begin with a rather personal attack!
In response, I will tweet Evan Marc a link to this article. And a normal girl!! If anything the post in question was designed to tell people not to worry so much! How is that smug advice?? I set up a national Awards scheme, judged over applications across the entire industry and managed to bring an entire industry together in one room. How does that make me less qualified than a married man who has only dated vicariously in recent years?! If your profile is too lengthy, it will put people off.
And there is no point writing your life story on a dating profile, or creating something so cultivated that you lose the sense of you. Evan Marc — in , yes there are people who read every word of a profile. But a LOT of people just skim read and glance at the main stuff. We have lots of other media going on.
The advice was to encourage people not to stress too much, or over think things — which a lot of singles I know have done, and it put them off online dating entirely. Tell men who send dick pics to keep doing it. Tell men who only contact you for booty calls to keep doing it. I was talking about people being told they should lose weight or improve their appearances to date!
Did you even read the explanations beneath the headers?! Getting my hopes up too soon because I felt like I really knew someone before we even met. Only agreeing to go on dates with guys who I felt I had a real connection … only to realise the guys I had most connection with in real life were ones I would have probably dismissed online.
Dating is about going out, meeting new people and learning about yourself. And that I think highlights the issue Evan Marc has with my article. We come at dating from completely different angles. I know about dating. How to approach dating. How to have a fun date. How to get confidence about dating. How to learn from dating. How to embrace being single. And frankly I find telling people to act a certain way to attract men pretty offensive and old-fashioned!
Some people want to spend their money being told exactly how to attract a husband — something EMK has clearly tapped into well — by the looks of his website he has quite an empire!