Jules Nemo More than 1 year ago -- Judilyn, there's a pretty good assessment of God's advice about marriage from the Bible at www. It's NOT safe to follow the example of those men and women who went against God's principles. That's one of the cool things about scripture - it doesn't gloss over man's poor choices and the tragic results. Sadly, many people don't get the lesson In fact, for our time it's pretty orthodox--if by "orthodox" you mean "Orthodox". But a better example of deception during courtship might be Jacob and Leah.
We don't get to see how Abraham and Sarah got together but we do see a good bit of their marriage. They seem happy with each other but the marriage is uncomfortably open. She tells him to have sex with Hagar, he tells her to have sex with Pharaoh and Abimelech.
So, perhaps it's best to not take dating and marriage advice from the Bible. I'm not sure that I agree with the idea that God has a plan for everybody. But if she does, I'm certain that it's not the same plan for each of us. Some are supposed to marry young, some old.
Some get to marry both young and old. And God wants some of us to never marry at all. Dobson several years ago, concerning sending our children to college - we had taken his advice, and it turned out to be the absolute worst thing we ever did for our daughter. We're all still paying, in many ways.
She didn't just 'wander' away from the Lord at the "Christian" college, she RAN, and it's taken many years to work out the problems. One summer, I steered her to a website that FotF had set up for young people, and here's the response, as related in that letter: She decided to check it out.
Less than fifteen minutes later, she ran into our kitchen, quite upset. In fact, when I read it myself, I found not one mention of God, His timing or plan for marriage, or waiting on Him. Judi Buller More than 1 year ago --I was not for online dating, for one, because dating itself is not biblical, and two, online dating seems to be a situation with far more opportunities for deception. Then I think about Isaac and Rebekah, and countless other stories about how God brings people together in unorthodox ways, and I realized that maybe I need to be open to circumstances outside my box.
My husband and I were determined to raise our children according to biblical principles in all areas, but over the years he decided that he wants them, especially our daughters, to "have fun" and do the American Dating scene. So there's been alot of heartache due to abandoning sexual purity.
They would have found one way or another to wander from the Lord, but it's pretty obvious, even the them, that getting involved in dating hastened it. Our oldest, now in her thirties, is making her way back to the Lord, and has decided that Christian dating sites may be the way to go. I'm a bit leary, but am learning to pray more and let God do His thing.
Jules Nemo More than 1 year ago -- Baconboy, no, dating is not Biblical. The Biblical way to reproduce is to have your parents purchase for you a nice wife if you are from a wealthy family, Isaac, or you work hard and purchase one or more for your self, Jacob. This system has the nice feature that you marry off your daughters when they are young and in their childbearing prime to an older, financially stable husband. It is also a really, really ugly institution that is best left behind.
Instead of asking what's Biblical, let's ask what's good, what works, what's Christian. Mark Owens More than 1 year ago --I met my wife on a Christian dating site two years ago and it has been an exciting and challenging faith walk from the very beginning. We were separated by 8, miles and 14 time zones but we made it work. God used the distance and time difference to develop and refine our relationship. Because we chose not to meet for 5 months the distance forced us to talk to one another and to get to know one another without the physical attraction getting in the way.
It is the way God wrote our love story and if a relationship is in His will then He can shrink time and space for you too. Carol Morrisey More than 1 year ago --I must say that sometimes God does just drop someone in your lap, so to speak. I had a party and one of my guests ran into my husband on the way there and brought him along. I've also seen some desperate people meeting others online with poor results.
But if the searcher makes sure to find only people who are committed to living for the Lord, I see how this could work. There was no internet dating service when I met my husband in If there had been, we might both have used it. I think it's very important not to be desperate.
In faith, trust God to lead, and then mistakes will not be made out of self-deception and need. Be willing to be lonely as long as it takes, and stay sexually pure until marriage. Pray until you have true peace about the relationship. Anonymous More than 1 year ago --matone99 In the bible God speaks directly to the things you mentioned. I can live without electricity, cell phones and big macs, but I cannot live without GOD and I chose to live by his word. Matt Thompson More than 1 year ago --Other things not mentioned in the Bible yet important, relevant to society, useful: William Henley More than 1 year ago I would question whether the concept of "dating" is even Biblical.
As I look at marriage in the Bible, finding a spouse appears to be done within the context of families and communities. The "Lone Ranger" attitude of finding a mate "out their somewhere" appears to be risky and full of heartache and heartbreak.
I know we can't turn back the clock, but I think even older adults seeking a mate need the accountability to family and friends as the seek discernment in their relationships. Anonymous More than 1 year ago --The discussion is moot since dating is not biblical. Nowhere in the bible does it speak of dating. People didn't have trial runs, their intent was marriage. My children were raised to value courtship, getting to know someone through family gatherings with the intent of marriage.
Show me where in the bible it speaks to dating. Humans were not designed to have their hearts repeatedly broken through dating. Lee Langshaw More than 1 year ago --My wife and I met in the earlier years of online Christian-single sites. It has proven to be a God-thing.
We had both had gone through extensive recovery counseling from our own destructive relations and had regained enough courage to explore relationships again. In fact my wife, Wendy did not even own a computer. That was 15 years ago. Both of us agree that God is in the middle of our relationship, which grows better and more fulfilling everyday. Both of our lives and families have been restored because of His faithfulness.
I don't recommend dating online for the sake of loneliness. One must have gone "through the fire" and appreciative enough to fully commit to the decisions you make. You have to have the full confidence in faith that God's will and timing is perfect and you are waiting on the Lord, not chasing after someone to fill your loneliness. Let Christ fill your emptiness before pursuing a Godly relationship here on earth. Rico Suave More than 1 year ago A lot of sturm und drang has been made about the rising age of marriage, young men supposedly not "manning up" and marrying women in their prime childbearing years, etc.
While I don't want to turn this into some sort of battle of the sexes, I think a lot of this is not the problem of the man, but women and men, but women in particular expecting to have to do nothing and God will just drop their "soul mate" on their front doorstep. Problem is, it just doesn't work that way.
I speak from experience, because that was me. I thought if I just went from home to work to home to church ad infinitum, God would bring the right person along. But both my job and my church were primarily populated with older married adults - not exactly a good dating pool. Once I decided to break out of that routine, improve myself in as many ways as possible and put myself in situations where I could meet eligible single women including online dating , lo and behold I found myself with more dates than I could handle and was married within two years.
Both men and women, if they are interested in marriage, have to work to make themselves as attractive as possible, both physically and spiritually, and get out in the world and meet people - whether that's online or in person. Sharon Cohick More than 1 year ago On August 18, my husband and I will be celebrating our 12 year anniversary.
We met on Yahoo Personals. I had given up on dating and prayed that God would be my husband and fill the void I felt. I was in Ohio, but in VA a man was asking his son to pray that God would find him a good woman. In May, , Tim and I were reading each others profile - it was like looking into a mirror.
He had 4 kids, I had 4 kids, all the birthdays except one were from January - March and within days of each other. Soon we were talking on the phone and planning our first meeting which was June 11, On June 12, Tim proposed, and we were married August Yes, it was a very short courtship, but for a girl who had never lived more than 5 min.
There is so much more to tell, but the short of it is if you give it to God, He will answer. There are no trial versions that expire while the website continues to show you matches you can't chat with in an effort to sell themselves. The only argument for the cost of a dating website is that it might cull unwanted persons. It doesn't matter where on the internet someone comes from. You still should be careful when meeting a stranger for the first time.
On POF you can also hide yourself from other people's searches. In this way you won't be messaged by random people you have no desire to chat with. You'll at least learn things about online dating that you can use to jump right in to ChristianCafe. I did connect with people faster on eHarmony and I might on ChristianCafe but I've come to realize that I'm in no hurry.