His long-winded rant embodies everything wrong with a growing number of boys who feel it is necessary to blame women for their own shortcomings. In Part 2 of our series "Help! His long-winded rant embodies everything wrong with a growing number of boys who feel it's necessary to blame women for their own shortcomings. And many will hold out until the right guy comes along, not realizing that a handsome, educated Tamil man with a professional job has plenty of options.
Should women not wait for someone worth their time? Even with this advantage, why are you complaining? The bottom line is women are empowering themselves by getting educated and bettering themselves.
Women today no longer need to rely financially on their parents or their spouse. This may be difficult for some men to accept, but it is true. So to all you hard-working, educated and ambitious Tamil women out there — keep at it.
A girl who is dark or fat will find it more difficult to attract a partner. Let's deconstruct this critically. The idea that superficiality is any less common in traditional Tamil society than modern Western society is a red herring.
Ask any Tamil girl about how much criticism they get for getting tanned or for not dressing like a nun.
It mattered a lot. So what makes you think that physical appearance did not matter in arranged marriages? Let us rule out choice. A Tamil woman cannot be a chooser and a dowry will make up for everything. Here is a typical scenario: Girl wants the guy to be her friend.
Guy confuses kindness with romance. Guy develops a crush on girl. Girl has no intention to date guy. Girl, being nice and valuing the friendship, lets the guy know she thinks of him as a friend thereby hoping not to hurt his feelings. Maybe the guy is too ugly, lacks an interesting personality, does not share the same morals and values as the girl, or simply is not what the girl wants.
It is a lot easier to blame the girl for not liking you than to look in the mirror and accept that maybe you are not as great as you think you are.
Instead of blaming women, maybe work on your social skills. Or pursue an interesting hobby. Even more ironic is that you likely put a girl in the friend zone while you were going for that girl. You know, the girl who you complained to about that girl who put you in the friend zone?
She probably had a crush on you, but you were too busy going for someone who might even have been bad for you. You want a girl who goes for someone below her standards, disregards looks and dates every nice guy that crosses her path How do you expect your previous points to happen without a girl having some history? Yet you make the argument that girls should. So what do you really want? A Tamil girl who waits her whole life just for you?
Marriage rates are in decline in developed countries as a consequence of higher living standards. Individuals in developed societies stay single longer primarily to establish themselves in their career, and to be financially stable enough to support a family. These elements are the key markers of a well-established community in a developed society. And these trends in our community are encouraging.
This means that young Tamil women and men in the diaspora are entering professional career paths and working towards becoming more financially stable. The result is a more highly educated diaspora, a bigger network for Tamil professionals, and the next generation of Tamils will grow up in a more affluent home with more opportunities. Honestly, it is time for us to accept that we are adults. It's because you are not what she wanted.
Come on, grow up. Looking to create your love story? Join the other couples who have dated and married through myTamilDate. Want to share your input? E-mail us at editor tamilculture. We will get back to you shortly.