Dating after 4 years. The 4 Stages of Dating Relationships.



Dating after 4 years

Dating after 4 years

I have been dating my boyfriend for 4 years and a few months. I am 32 and he will be 40 next month. I also made it clear in those first 6 months that I was not dating him to be his girlfriend forever.

We knew we loved each other, so I thought everything was fine. But then a year and half into our relationship, my sister had some marital problems which kind of prompted me to bring up marriage with him. I mentioned, or asked, to try to confirm that he did want to get married and have kids. Then he went MIA on me for a week.

I said that was fine, since I thought that it was only a year and half into our relationship. But then around the 2. He was dealing with a very sick dad who passed away last year and basically took care of his parents, changed his dad, fed him, etc. Then I asked that I would meet his parents right? How can I answer that? He says he wants things to be better before he introduces me to them formally but I told him I need him to do something to feel better, take some action to further the relationship not just wait it out hoping to feel better.

So he agreed to meet my sister and brother in law last week when they were in town for an hour. And even after recognizing that his response was overblown and that I should be the one who was offended at the way he came across to my family. G Dear G, Thanks for your question. To use your own words, we are deeply troubled by this. First of all our condolences. Having to take care of a sick parent, and then having to watch them die, is very difficult.

Everyone reacts differently to these types of situations. Typically, people want to be consoled by the people they are closest to. Often these types of situations draw people closer together, not push them farther apart. It sounds like you have. We unfortunately agree with your assessment: There will always be something with this guy.

And his reaction to your sister, and then his subsequent action-going MIA again-is telling. What does you sister think? What does she say? Most people who are serious about their prospective partner want their partner to meet their family, if not for the simple reason of letting their family know they are serious about the relationship they are in. This is a red flag. We know this is very hard. Contrary to popular belief, guys can commit to a relationship.

Usually we know right away how committed we want to be. Four years is a long time to be unsure, especially since neither of you are in your early twenties. We hope this gets you thinking a bit. You have to keep talking to him. Communication is so important in a relationship. You are not being too pushy here. You deserve to know the truth. You deserve to have someone who loves you and respects you the way you want to be loved and respected.

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Dating after 4 years

I have been dating my boyfriend for 4 years and a few months. I am 32 and he will be 40 next month. I also made it clear in those first 6 months that I was not dating him to be his girlfriend forever. We knew we loved each other, so I thought everything was fine. But then a year and half into our relationship, my sister had some marital problems which kind of prompted me to bring up marriage with him. I mentioned, or asked, to try to confirm that he did want to get married and have kids.

Then he went MIA on me for a week. I said that was fine, since I thought that it was only a year and half into our relationship.

But then around the 2. He was dealing with a very sick dad who passed away last year and basically took care of his parents, changed his dad, fed him, etc. Then I asked that I would meet his parents right?

How can I answer that? He says he wants things to be better before he introduces me to them formally but I told him I need him to do something to feel better, take some action to further the relationship not just wait it out hoping to feel better.

So he agreed to meet my sister and brother in law last week when they were in town for an hour. And even after recognizing that his response was overblown and that I should be the one who was offended at the way he came across to my family.

G Dear G, Thanks for your question. To use your own words, we are deeply troubled by this. First of all our condolences. Having to take care of a sick parent, and then having to watch them die, is very difficult.

Everyone reacts differently to these types of situations. Typically, people want to be consoled by the people they are closest to. Often these types of situations draw people closer together, not push them farther apart. It sounds like you have. We unfortunately agree with your assessment: There will always be something with this guy. And his reaction to your sister, and then his subsequent action-going MIA again-is telling.

What does you sister think? What does she say? Most people who are serious about their prospective partner want their partner to meet their family, if not for the simple reason of letting their family know they are serious about the relationship they are in. This is a red flag. We know this is very hard. Contrary to popular belief, guys can commit to a relationship. Usually we know right away how committed we want to be. Four years is a long time to be unsure, especially since neither of you are in your early twenties.

We hope this gets you thinking a bit. You have to keep talking to him. Communication is so important in a relationship. You are not being too pushy here. You deserve to know the truth. You deserve to have someone who loves you and respects you the way you want to be loved and respected.

Dating after 4 years

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5 Comments

  1. Differences are normal and couples will learn about themselves and their relationship as they note how they handle these differences with each other. We hope this gets you thinking a bit. Typically, people want to be consoled by the people they are closest to.

  2. Read More There are 4 predictable stages that couples experience in a dating relationship. We know this is very hard. For women especially there may also be a desire to figure out where the relationship is headed.

  3. Differences are normal and couples will learn about themselves and their relationship as they note how they handle these differences with each other. What does she say? And even after recognizing that his response was overblown and that I should be the one who was offended at the way he came across to my family.

  4. Usually we know right away how committed we want to be. What does you sister think? Everyone reacts differently to these types of situations.

  5. I also made it clear in those first 6 months that I was not dating him to be his girlfriend forever. Often these types of situations draw people closer together, not push them farther apart.

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